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Embarrassing Bikini Stories:

…NEVER Wear a Bikini in an Adventure Pool!

I’m thrilled to be featured today as the Newbie showcase on Victoria’s fantastic blog VeViVos. And what better way to introduce myself than to share one of the MOST embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to me!

(Newbie Showcase MisplacedBrit)

…But that’s only half of it!

What’s a girl to do when you discover your bikini top floating along in front of you in an adventure pool?!

Gaining ground, in fact.

Because you’re so busy grasping your newly discovered exposed flesh that you can’t even swim.
Panic, supersedes embarrassment.
Mother nature turned me into a tadpole!
No arms.
Propeller legs.
Just trying to keep my head above the surface.
And now what?
How on earth are you supposed to get it on again?
The difficulty staying afloat whilst clutching your breasts and chasing a bikini top around an adventure pool
doesn’t even compare to the difficulty staying afloat whilst relocating said bikini top, whilst still clutching your breasts, whilst still being thrust around an adventure pool.
Lap 18?!
The frozen moments when somebody propels them-self alongside me.
Desperate attempts to look normal and avoid unnecessary attention.
Right about to whip it over my head.
When an over conscientious lifeguard actually leant into the pool ahead of me to ask if I was stuck in there!!!
Are you kidding me?!
There’s no time for a diplomatic, ’thank you so much for asking… Please GO AWAY!’
HE (of course it was a he) was about to grab me out!

A hasty ’No, no!

Totally ok…
(not convincing enough…
Huge smile on my face) …TOTALLY OK!’
And I passed him.
Only to have to wait for the next batch of passerby’s actually get by.
I HAD to get out of there.
Next half quiet moment.
And the boobs were free.
Quick as a flash over my head.
Then another lap or so of keeping it in position whilst trying to undo the knots to get it back around my back.
If they’d have served tea by that pool, I’d have been straight over.
…Because if there’s one think we Brits know how to do, it’s how to cope with shock!

Embarrassing Bikini StoriesLinking up Embarrassing Bikini Stories with #PoCoLo

*Victoria has been shortlisted and finalist for UK parent blogging awards year after year in categories, inspire, innovate, video, and social media. If there was one for poetry, she’d be there too! Don’t miss her travel tips and reviews either: VictoriaVisits

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  1. Love it – had me in splits! Luckily I haven’t had one of those moments (yet!). God, imagine if he had lifted you out? LOL, got to look at the positives 🙂

  2. It’s as though we forget how to function as adults when faced with embarrassment isn’t it! Well done for keeping cool (ish) and not being dragged out of the pool by the lifeguard!


    • Hahaha! Definitely not being dragged out of the pool by the lifeguard was one of my greatest embarrassment saving achievements to date! 🙂

  3. Haha! I can only imagine! Well few minutes before I read this I fell in front of a lot of people and I wish I could run but my son is there holding me hand. So what to do? Try not to cry until I got home. Bruised knees and bruised pride makes me cry. So I know how it feels.

    Congrats on being the newbie of the week =)


    • Oh honey!
      Actually being in pain and needing to keep a brave happy face about it is NEVER pleasant!!
      …A cup of tea will help 😉

  4. I read half of what happened on Vic’s blog and had to come over. *mother nature turned me into a tadpole* haha I love it! As mortified as you were at the time, atleast you can laugh about it now!! #PoCoLo

    • Hahaha! Thanks Natasha 🙂
      …There’s just nowhere to hide is there; if we don’t get to the point we can just laugh at ourselves!

  5. Lol, brilliant – what an embarrassing moment that must have been and so glad that you managed to retrieve your bikini and replace it eventually even if you did attract the attention of the lifeguard in the process! I had a similar thing happen to me as a teenager when diving into a swimming pool trying to attract the attention of a boy I had a crush on – I certainly succeeded in attracting attention but not in the way I wanted it to!

    • OH NO!! Did he/ they see that???
      Sorry honey, I can feel your pain!!
      What are we going to do with ourselves? 😉

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