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Our kids know we love them.

But do they know what we love about them?

Caught in the moment, they enjoy what they’re doing.

But when you ask them, do they know what they like?

Do they know what they’re good at?

ParentingThere are a remarkable number of adults who feel that they were loved as children, but have no idea what about them is lovable. Who don’t really know what they like, and can’t say what they’re good at. Who may acknowledge that they’re likable people, but can’t answer what about them is admirable, special or beautiful.

I want my kids to know I love them. I want them to know what I love about them, what about them is admirable, special and beautiful. parentingI want to affirm the things that make them happy, things they enjoy and things they’re good at.

And it doesn’t need to be complicated!

Actually, I just bought a little note book. One each.

Before they go to bed, I ask them one question. What was the best thing about the day? Or what they most enjoyed? parentingWhat they thought they did well? Or what made them the happiest?

Not every night, but quite often, I take up their little note book and write down what they said, just the way they said it. Then I write what I’ve seen in them that day. The beauty of their personalities that’s shined through. What they were doing when I heard them laughing. What I love and appreciate about them. What makes them special and more beautiful than gold.

 

ParentingIt’s an eye opener for me too! It’s easy to think you have a good idea about what your children like, but still to have missed the little things. I love that after a couple of weeks you can start to see trends in what their favorite things are. Maybe ’silly’ little things that you wouldn’t otherwise have thought so much about. It’s fantastic to know that there are little things you can do that they love and appreciate so much. That you can make a tiny effort to do something in the day, that you know makes it special for them.

 

They know they have a book.

They know the drawer it’s in.

Sometimes they ask me to read something to them from their book.

Sometimes they forget about it and are thrilled when they catch a glimpse and see that there’s even more written about them than last they looked.

I’m not suggesting that a notebook is sufficient, or that it more than covers all their needs.

But when in doubt they can go to it.

They can sit on my knee and I can read it to them, or they will read it for themselves.

They could laugh about it, they may cry about it.

It’s to remind them of who they really are.

And how precious that is.

 

 

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37 Comments

  1. I think this is a great idea. I do ask my kids regularly what they like and I do tell them what I loved about them. I would love to do something like this but I don’t think I would find the time to do it or I would start and then forget about it.
    #brillantblogposts

    • I think the great thing with these kind of notebooks instead of ’diaries’ is that it doesn’t matter if there are weeks or months between entries, a couple a year and they’d still have such a beautiful little present later 🙂

  2. I LOVE this!! It’s beauty is in it’s simplicity. I have a book for each of the littles which is a yearly record of their lives with spaces for the adventures we’ve had together and my hopes and dreams for them (I’ve written about if before here btw: http://bodfortea.co.uk/2012/04/our-story-for-my-daughter.html – excuse the formatting it’s one of my older posts!). But it doesn’t capture all these little comments and thoughts that you describe. I love most that you’re sharing these moments with them NOW. What wonderful way to boost their self esteem and a great set of memories for the future too. I’m going to make a concerted effort to do the same x

  3. This is such a beautiful idea! I had pinned this for reading and I’m so glad I came back to it. I think the best gifts we can give our children is self-esteem, and this is a great way to develop it.

    • That is one of the most beautiful sentiments I’ve ever read!!
      I’m going to quote you on that one 🙂
      Thanks so much for popping over & commenting. You’ve inspired me.

  4. This is such a special idea. I would love to be able to look back at this cute things my kids said and what they were interested in. You think you’ll always remember, but the details skip away. How special for you and your family! #shinebloghop

    • Thank you lovely! & it’s never too late to start 🙂
      I think even adults would be surprised to be reminded of the things they most enjoyed doing a year or so ago… We’re changing all the time! 😉

    • Franki, please do 🙂

      I love the comment Tarana @sandinmytoes just posted…
      ’I think the best gift we can give our children is self-esteem’

      Go for it!

  5. What an amazing idea and thing to do for them and when they get older I just know they will love going through this and reading all about everything that’s in it. At the end of each year I take certain photography projects and blog posts I have done of the things they say and do and will be making a book for each of them to have forever. Similar idea but love how much more personal yours is. Beautiful. Thanks for linking up to Share With Me #sharewithme

    • Another great idea!! I’ve taken pics at the beginning of school years… Never thought of putting them in a little book!
      Nothing better than inspiring each other and prompting creativity 🙂
      Thanks for your lovely comment.

  6. What a fabulous idea! I must admit I try to note down the little things that makes me smile, and makes them, them! But I’m certainly not as good at this as you clearly are. You’ve just totally given me further inspiration to keep noticing, writing down and remembering. Thank you. Xx

    • Thank you!
      …Don’t get the impression I write down EVERY night… That hasn’t quite worked out for me 🙂 …I ask, and they love telling me. A few times a week it lands in the book 🙂

      Actually, I have a secret one on the go for my niece too *shhhhh
      Every time we meet up I ask her what her favorite thing today was, then I sneak away and write down all that I love and admire and enjoy about her. I’m really going to love giving her that years from now <3

  7. This is such a great post! I’ve never thought about telling my kids WHAT I love about them. I have a notebook for my son that I write in from time to time also. I just write letters to him now (he is just a baby) but maybe when he’s older I’ll try asking him questions like you do. Great idea – thanks for sharing!

  8. I love this idea – an easy and inexpensive way to connect with and document the part of our children we, more so than anyone else in the world, get to see.

    I’m actually speechless right now (whoa!) because this simple idea is going to be so much fun and will probably make both my husband and I blubber like babies when we look back on it!

    Thank you for sharing such a gift to help me remember the most precious, fleeting moments. I’m thankful you shared at the #SHINEBlogHop today.

    • Wow! Thank you. I’m so glad to have been the source of one tiny drop of inspiration.
      You’re books will be beautiful 🙂

  9. This is such a lovely idea, and it will be so pecial and so sweet for them to look back on when they are older. What a lovely idea to show how much you appreciate them for who they are. Just lovely! xx #brilliantblogposts

  10. What a beautiful little thing to do! I have a little book for each one of mine where I record the cute things they said but I love your idea to write what you love about them as well. I do it in my own diary, but having it in their own books makes it theirs. xx

  11. this is such a wonderfully simple but oh so meaningful way to capture the essence of love. I think I’ll start one for my daughter, what a beautiful gift to give each of your children, really beautiful!

    • Thank you Tinuke! Your comment made me imagine a whole generation of children with little books hidden away – should they ever doubt how important they are <3

  12. What a wonderful idea. I really like this and totally agree. It’s very important to value children. They are a wonderful blessing. Your children are very lucky to have you as a mummy. Great post, great idea! #brilliantblogposts

  13. That is such a special way to make your children feel special! Hopefully you have started a family tradition and your children will go onto do the same for their children.

    It’s always nice to read back on things from when we were children, so not only do the books make special reading for now, but I am sure they’ll be even more special in10, 20, 30 or 40 years from now.

    Popped over from #BrilliantBlogPosts.

  14. That’s a lovely idea for capturing all the little moments that we think we’ll always treasure and yet so quickly forget in the avalanche of new, exciting memories. And it’s something they’ll be able to look back on as well as you. Fab.

  15. This is such a fabulous idea and something your kids will be able to refer back to when they’re older and maybe a little more insecure during their teen years. My twin daughters will be 20 in September and I always let them know how much they are loved; I don’t think they always appreciate this, but I do it anyway.

  16. What a fab idea and beautiful keepsake. I meticulously kept baby books for the girls and have one on the go for my baby boy too. I also have another record book to record random bits, but a little notebook like this would also be a great idea 🙂 #brilliantblogposts

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